Monday, September 29, 2014

My Story

They can't go hang out with their friends because they freak out about it too much. Its hard for them to go into an unknown setting because they may have a huge panic attacks. Panic attacks are almost on a daily basis. And when they do get super bad it feels like they are going to die. So many people deal with anxiety and worry so often. Me included.

I haven't had anxiety my entire life. It started just a few years ago. I would freak out about every little thing. I just thought that I was super dramatic and nothing was really wrong. Then one day my heart started skipping beats and hurting super bad. I wouldn't be able to breath for ten seconds because my heart was doing crazy things. I went to the doctor about it and they did blood tests and everything came up normal. They decided to put a heart monitor on me to see if anything was wrong. Nothing was wrong either. I was super scared because I didn't know what was wrong with me and if I was going to die. My doctor talked to me about my problem and said that I had some kind of anxiety disorder. I didn't really care much about it. Then when I went to a church camp this past summer, it got super bad. I started not being able to breath and my legs and arms went numb. I couldn't move. I started going into unconsciousness. I thought for sure I was going to die. I remember just praying that God would help me since I was all alone and I couldn't do anything to help myself. After my panic attack was gone I was okay. Now today I freak out about the simplest things and am never just at peace. I've had people tell me that I'm just seeking attention and that I don't really have a problem. Little do they know what I go through. Now I am not telling you this story for sympathy. I want to let you know that if it wasn't for God I would be way worse off in my anxiety. Its hard to trust God in things that we can't control, I know! But we have to be willing to give him our entire lives and let Him take over. We can't control the things that go on anyways, so why worry about it? I know this is super hard to do, because I'm still struggling with it. But I think if we all work together we can over come our anxiety!

7 comments:

  1. Wow, this is really encouraging. Yeah I don't know how people without God do it. Thanks, very uplifting. -Bethany!

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  2. Oh, Ashley Ashley Ashley Ashley.
    I can relate. I don't have panic attacks, although heart palpitations? They happen. I have trichotillomania. It used to be really, terribly bad. But it's getting better now.
    So just know: over time, with lots of effort and prayer and literally throwing yourself at God, it will get better. It will take the rest of your life to completely trust God.
    But in the end?
    It will all work out. <3

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    Replies
    1. I am so sorry for you had to go through too. And thank you so much for your encouragement. Trusting God completely will not happen overnight.

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  3. Ashley, I'm sorry about this. I had known you had trouble with anxiety for a long time. I'm praying for you. :)

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♥Ashley